Good morning, All! Welcome to the MashUp for 12 February 2015, which isn't going to be a MashUp. I drew the cards, sure. 10 of Swords, XV the Devil reversed, the Queen of Wands. Yeah, yeah, I get it. Keep fighting the good fight against your own materialism, even though it is tearing up your feelings, and DON'T MISS this opportunity to set some things straight deep down in the machinery of my mind that have strayed. With any luck, I can come out of this, even on a small scale like today, feeling pretty much Queen of Wands-y, collected and how I like to feel, controlled and with my own reserves. I get it. In Stead, what I wanted to do today was to post this little piece I did on Fear in the Tarot. I wrote it while in a course with a gang of roving astral pirates, TP, and just ran across it eeearly this morning. Until tomorrow;
"I find myself in a curious position; I find myself obsessing about Fear. Not my own fears, but Fear itself, and where it manifests in the Tarot deck; For some reason, it stuck in my mind that it had to do with either one of the 6s or XVIII, the Moon. Perhaps the 6 W or the 6 S, but uncomfortably I didn’t wish to look too closely at the 6 P. Now it is true that the 6es of W and S have elements that can bring Fear to some situations, but the 6 P is abounding in them! And XVIII, the Moon, seems to be self-evident in its presentation, like Justice or Judgment.
This obsession with the idea of Fear somehow links back to my “Court loyalty.” I have a somewhat orthodox idea that we all belong to one of the Court families, and that our likes/dislikes, pros/cons, etc. may be found there. However, my head has taken it a step further; I seem to think we owe a loyalty to whichever Court we belong. All my life I seem to have been born, raised and formed as a member of the Court of Pentacles. I have usually disliked the idea of the construct of the family of Swords, even though I can see the necessity of a sword here and there from time to time. However, lately, I find myself more and more involved with Swords than with Pentacles, and it feels traitorous. I don’t know why, but it does. I feel like I’m too old a dog to learn new tricks – I have spent more than 60 years in and around the court of Pentacles, and am as firmly a member of that Court as anyone else, sometimes more so.
So, what is going on? Why would I be changing Courts? Why would I want to do that? What does it signify? Am I trying to climb the same ladder I have already successfully climbed in the Court of Pentacles? What delusion is operating in this manner, or totally unheard of development? In the meantime, this is screwing with my sleep, as I’m waking up in the middle of the nights trying to unravel sigils, signs and portents in a whirling kaleidoscope of card images in my dreams and musings."