Saturday, October 31, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to the Scales of Ma’at reading for 01-Nov-2015: the Knight of Machetes (Swords) as my Heart card and II the High Priestess as the Feather of Truth today. (Today’s deck, that I was impatient to use, is the new *Ghetto Tarot’ by Alice Smeets. After MUCH unnecessary Political Correctness back & forth bullshit, it has made it to press and is absolutely LOVELY! The images are alive in a way I have never seen them before, and if it reminds me of anything, it reminds me of a gritty kind of ‘Tarot in the streets’ presentation because it IS that immediate. They read well, too. I give this deck two enthusiastic thumbs up!)  Let’s just dive in, naked, into the lime Jell-O with cottage cheese, shall we? Well, you would think the costume of the Knight of Machetes would be worn through with holes and stained with involuntary fear from the sheer number times I’ve had to come in her and throw those old glad rags on. I like the card illustration – the knight ready to go do battle for his “school,” i.e. his set of beliefs, his “place.” We know his good points (fidelity, smart, creative) and his bad (hair trigger, stubborn, unwillingness to change course.)Let’s look at his bones, Mamma. He’s “Prince of the chariot of the winds,” lives in Tiphareth in the Tree of Life. In astrology he’s astride Capricorn and Aquarius, and he is ALL air = The Air of Air. The Knight of Machetes is the pure manifestation of mind and intellect, full of plans and ideas which on the worst side may disturb and confuse each other, on the best create an inexhaustible spring of creative thoughts. The Knight is intelligent, idealistic, full of creativity and fluidity, a real Mercurian spirit. . . .” (Raven) My Drive is idealism and, intellectual agility, whereas my Light is creativity, and intelligence.  I’m so familiar with this guy I could do him in my sleep. He’s okay – so if that is where my Heart is today, I can live with it; I only hope I am living him (again) on a higher cycle, a higher plane, and not simply repeating the same groove on the vinyl over and over again. That is up to me, to take him up to higher levels; I shall. Much to my delight, my Feather of Truth card today is II the High Priestess. I am delighted precisely because I don’t see her very often; she is like the exotic aunt you had as a child who would occasionally blow throw trailing odors of spices and faraway places. I think the Priestess is deeply fond of me, but she is also by Nature a hidden person, and I am very much a ram in a chine shoppe by Nature. She excites the hell out of me when I catch glimpses of her; my 1st exposure to her secrets was in the eyes of old-time movie stars like Rita Hayworth and Gloria Swanson and so many others. The women themselves were rather common and ordinary, sometimes even cheap, but when the goddess shone in them they were FLAWLESS. I’m that maybe-rare gay guy that finds women sexually exciting, not just “girlfriends” or “role models.”  I am as close to the statistically perfect “bisexual” as one is likely to meet; and my standards are astronomically high. My wife, by the way, isn’t, but it isn’t an issue for her. So when I meet the Priestess ANYWHERE I’m on High Alert, not primarily sexually, but with the heightened awareness that I am in in an ambiance where I am breathing pure feminine waters, similar to breathing in the womb. The Anima is at home, of course; she ran off to make tea in the kitchen or something, whistling a happy tune, something from *The King and I,* I think. As for me, I’m the pilgrim back in the séjour, watching the eyes of the High Priestess and listening to her low chanting as she tells me stories of long ago and far away and of times in which I think I would have been very small, indeed. When Night and Day walked the oceans of the Void, and stars illuminated lone lotus blossoms in the mud. I eat that stuff up, you know. I was born a Seeker, a Demasker, a Tell-Me-Everything!  Let’s take a quick look at Mamma’s bones: she’s on the Path of Gimel (13) in the Tree of Life. She is (oh surprise surprise) the Moon in Scorpio in house 12, the moon as symbol for the lunar consciousness, Scorpio standing for the powers of the unconscious. House 12 stands for the mysteries. She walks between Kether and Tiphareth. And naturally, as the Moon, she is Water. She IS Duality. “The High Priestess represents the deeper, more subtle aspect of the female archetype - the darkness, the mystery, psychic power, the might of the moon to enlighten the subconscious. The High Priestess is silence, passivity, containing a power of her own. Only when retiring from the world, can we allow our subconscious to rise, listen to our inner voice and recognize our spiritual power.” (Raven)  Her Drive is all about find the inner sources and Light comes from being one with the beginning of all, aware of the wisdom from the subconscious.  “They dined on mince, and slices of quince, Which they ate with a runcible spoon;  And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand, They danced by the light of the moon, The moon, The moon, They danced by the light of the moon.” (Edward Lear) I shall not only remember, but I shall plumb the depths of my opportunity today, my Intuition works like a trustworthy friend. 

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at, a 2-card daily reading for today the 31­Oct-2015: the Knight of Stakes (Wands) and the Queen of Holy Water (Cups) as my Heart and Feather of Truth cards, respectively. It’s here! Happy Hallowe’en!! Whether one celebrates it in Fun, or in Seriousness, or in Symbol, ALL peoples have a Hallowe’en, even those who don’t believe because that “gives it credit,”  because Hallowe’en is the grand human festival celebrating the Unknown, the “Beyond the Ken of Human Understanding.”  It is when we acknowledge and give official status to Shadow (one measly day a year, but he has the left laugh – he’s ALWAYS here.) I shan’t wax prolix on the subject; merely mention that, IMHO, this is the ONLY holiday of the year, along with seasonal festivities, which it is meet to celebrate in our most joyous fashion! (Today’s deck is once again the deck I love & prefer at this (or any) time of the year, *The Vampire Tarot* by Robert. M. Place. And again, 2 non-usual cards from the deck have surfaced, belying its nature and title. Nevertheless, I stand by my faith! Do a little research and see for yourself; the deck is to Die for!! Ha!) I can’t help but love the cards’ clever and infinite sense of humor; look at what they have given me!! It is a clever, literate, sensitive joke made with both humor and tenderness. My Heart today is Edgar Allan Poe, a deity in and of the Shadow, a master of the wand (the pen), and most surely a knight as witnessed by his uxoriousness, immortalized as “Lenore.” This is not a reasonable man, but he IS a genius. I readily claim the Knight as one of my past/recent incarnations, but E.A. Poe I leave upon his throne; that brash I am not. Continuing their double –joke punch, the cards follow though their 1st left upper-cut with a right direct to the kisser! – my Feather of Truth for today is Pamela Coleman Smith as the Queen of Holy Water (Cups)! We ALL know what we owe Pamela Smith; to see her here as an incarnation of Love (Aphrodite the Queen) and to acknowledge her essentialness to our process, our Paths. She re-gave a vision to Tarot at a time it desperately needed it, and tarologues everywhere “should” honor her memory. (Among others, of course! before flame wars start!) An apotheosis of Emotion is signified by the Queen, and I’m not feeling very Queen-y today (hey! Quiet in the Peanut Gallery, there! One mare smart remark and you can just sashay your drag ass out of here!), so unless the Feather is a target to aim for I am going to grok this card in the Light of Moon at the moment, my II? III? VI and XVII, my wife. I don’t tell a lot of her story on these pages because it is HER story, not mine, but suffice to say she is of inestimable aide and deeply profound support on my Journey. I quite literally would not have made it this far without her helpmeet. I think the Feather of Truth here is: listen to the Feather of Truth you have already partnered, the Queen of Cups, and reflect well on why you, a Fire being who fancies himself a marginal being, like a knight, like E.A. Poe, allied yourself with the Queen of Water. And also, remember, this is a weekend of Energy! so use it wisely! “My life has no limits; it is filled with boundless energy and I am a radiant, loveable being.”   

Friday, October 30, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at reading for 30-Oct-2015: my Heart card today is the King of Cups and the Feather of Truth resides in the 8 of Swords. ‘Today’s deck is the *Secrets of the Necronomicon Tarot* by Donald Tyson. The Deck abounds with the inhabitants of the Cthulhu Mythos; if you know it, it is pointless to reiterate it here, and it you don’t, far too complicated for this space. « You have a vastly overrated idea of my perversity. » I found myself saying that the other day to a commentator to my blog: I have rarely heard of erudition being taken as vulgarity and a perception of human character called putting your nose in someone’s else’s shit, but someone is always taking me to task for net seeing this or that in the cards, or the method, or my definitions & descriptions, or a thousand and one other little things all meaning they are afraid to put down their hands down their own pants and check and if they’ve got a pair or NOT. Balls. Brass balls. I do. So if you will, milk, cookies, lollipops and lies go elsewhere, we’ve got shit to do. [For some reason Marduk is around today; I can feel him meandering the “corridors”; it isn’t all that common for an antique deity to come back and wander around, something must be up. If you don’t know him, Marduk =  “Solar Calf,” in Mesopotamian religion, the chief god of the city of Babylon and the national god of Babylonia; he was eventually called simply Bel, or Lord. After conquering the monster of primeval chaos, Tiamat, he became Lord of the Gods of Heaven and Earth. Think Amun-Re’s Babylonian brother.] Usually when the Great Ones are out and about, unless it concerns you, you tend to hear far off footsteps and that’s about it. But that isn’t the case here; I think Marduk is milling around Europe, getting impatient for us to open our doors and let his people in to safety, at least temporarily.) There is a general “tension is rising, ladies & gentlemen. Premier Kruschev has just removed a shoe and has placed it on the podium” feeling about things here in the Old World now. PLUS, I am getting the rising message, louder and louder, that I’M NOT ASKING FOR ENOUGH. Let’s look at the cards. Today, my Heart is the King of Cups, the “Lord of Waves and waters” and he sits in Chokmah in the Tree of Life. In astrology he sits squarely akimbo between Aquarius and Pisces. He’s about being Fire but in a world of Water, so it’s a bit foggy in here where he lives. (Great for exotic flora, though!) He’s notoriously unreliable and notoriously out of place. “Briah is the world of emotions and sensitivity, and the King of Cups might have good senses for art, poetry and lyric, his compassion can make him a good healer and/or priest/doctor. If he manages to reach real depth and inner conviction, he will be able to provide rich tenderness and emotional warmth.” (Raven) My Drive is redemption and grace, while my Light is compassion and sensibility. So; whose company am I keeping, today, if I may be so bold as to ask? Who or what has something to teach me today? What is going to by MY Feather of Truth today? Well; hmmm . . . err . . . it seems to have manifested in the middle of a tragedy, with 4 dead mean with swords in their chests, a freaked out girl holding a sword, and four more swords untouched on the wall. ‘What a scene! You can only imagine what Tarantino or the Coen Bros. would do with it!)  Eight of Swords – well, oh crap, there went any ideas of a smooth, eventless day. My playmate for the day is Interference. Shit. He’s the letter Hod, as well, and Hod is in the Tree of Life. He belongs to air. In astrology, he is Jupiter (again!) in the 1st decan of Gemini (all you schizoids out there, be careful; I’ve got a driver’s license and I do not break for schizos or other misplaced manifestations!) “With the Eight of Swords, the suit enters Hod, the realm of intellect and logic, and one should think how happy the Swords must be now that they are 'amongst fellows'. But Hod is more the structure of mind, while the Swords are the freedom of mind - conflicts are pre-programmed.” (Raven) This is 8 on his home ground, and he isn’t even comfortable here? “That be a bad sign, PurlyMae . . . .” All the 8s are like that, they are like a “lost generation” or some like simile in a societal setup. Usually the illustration shows walking away from what you have wasted before towards the unknown, but there are still hidden depths for you upon which to draw. So here you stand looking at the havoc you have wrought in the past, and the future is just outside that door. Given the way this card is illustrated, the lesson could be that grief is even counter-productive. Further, the 8 of Swords reveal the nature of the suit regarding its tendency of overanalyzing and considering everything, digging out a counter-argument for any argument there is, quickly recognizing any limitation and conclusion that in the end means the interference in its own reasoning. It isn’t a comfortable suit, it isn’t meant to be, and the Truth on display here is subtler and applicable differently to each person. I believe the Truth as applied to me hear is to be especially careful of how I present the “truth of myself” to others and in doing so I need to continue the work of moving on and making new inroads as I continue to walk the Path. “I skillfully direct my energies into the things that will make the most difference.”    

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to the Scales of Ma’at daily reading for 29-Oct-2015: the 9 of Chalices and XX Judgement are my Heart and Feather of Truth cards, respectively. (Today’s deck is the *Dark Tarot* by Luis Royo. Dark. Correlation iffy at times, if not plainly erroneous. Nice-ish art. Euh, I wouldn’t weep over its dismissal to the bottom of a crooked-leg cabinet. I’ve never found any particular affinity between Tarot and big-titted warrior babes; I doubt you will, either. It’s the art of an adolescent’s wet dream.) In the spirit of not really liking this deck very much and moving right along, I think I shall be largely ignoring the illustrations here and instead comment on the application of a card to my day. So here, we start the day with a 9 of Cups, a throw of the die with which any reasonable person in this galaxy would be quite content. And I am, except for the unfortunate art chosen for this card, which instead looks like something entitled “Water-Spirit-Whore-Offers-Opium.” I don’t envision her as the definition of this card, “Happiness.” Let’s look over here, instead; ah, I am in Yesod in the Tree of Life and I have ridden Water here. In astrology I am Jupiter in the 2nd decan of Pisces (fish & water – the secret ingredients to happiness! Ha!) Tree of Life. I believe it is important to notice that I have returned to the central “pillar” of the Tree, and enlightened by Tiphareth that resides above one step from Malkuth as its root and origin, the completion of the journey. Briah “drinks” best at the “seas of Yesod,” so the card shows harmony and fulfilment in emotional matters. REMEMBER, I’m talking about the card IN MY HEAD, not that swamp-leech shapeshifter on this card itself from this deck. If that were to signify ANYTHING to do with the 9 of Chalices, it would be its shadow side, “self-indulgence and complaisance, the temptation to just enjoy the happiness but forget the reflection that keeps the light upon the waters alive.” (Raven) I DO feel rather 9 of Cups-esque, however, “For The Most Part,” in my emotional life. I STILL have the years-long issue of the addition of another person in my life, but that has yet to happen if it is ever to happen. I have laid aside most, if not all expectation. I know, I know, not until I don’t need it . . .  yeah, I know how that little game works. One must abandon ALL desire for the thing desired. Thus one may arrive at happiness in relation to the phantom desire only by abandoning the phantom desire. (I’m sure that when the Lord of Light and Darkness wove that into the Cosmos he did it specifically to fuck with the Asians, which is kind of mean-spirited. Ha! J ) My Drive is love, optimism and trust lit by my Light, luck and compassion. A particular problem with this card & its shadow to always be ready to challenge is its tendency towards self-indulgence and vanity. So, voilà the message to and from my Heart today. And the Feather of Truth? Well, today it is a card I like but am sure that I do not fully understand (because I have yet to live it! ipso facto . . .) Like Death, I have no fear of Judgement. I am under no illusion, I believe, about myself or my abilities and talents, and my all-too-human “involvement in my own case.” (It is similar to one of those police procedural television productions, where law prohibits you from participating in the investigation of a crime because you are emotionally attached in some fashion to the victim. My episode is even better! I am BOTH the victim AND the investigator, who find out that the criminal is . . . ME! J Maddening, isn’t it?) On a not so-aside aside, I do NOT object to this particular card’s art, although it is quite clearly not drawn with the Tarot in mind. (Which touches, perhaps, my little hissy fit with this deck; it is advertised as “Tarot drawn by Luis Royo” but it isn’t – it may be his art, but it ISN’T drawn for Tarot! Don’t lie to me and claim that.  Don’t make me stop the car and heat the irons, young man!) Here the message of Judgement is a glorious, spectacularly beautiful angel with golden wings and hair standing on an outcropping at the sea. Okay. Nice image. Thanks. Now, get out of my way while I look at the Tarot. As usual, I’m heading back to Tree Town. I am XX, Judgment, (The Aeon in Thoth decks), on the Path of Shin, 31, in the Tree of Life. Astrologically, I am BOTH Jupiter and Saturn in Aquarius; I AM Liberation and Redemption. As a “purifier”, my element is naturally Fire. I’m walking from Malkuth to Hod, and my number XX has the cross some of 2 (10x2), the number of the Revelation of Destiny. Judgement “is the trump of time and the changes dictated by the times, it addresses finality and destruction as well as liberation, hope and redemption.”  (Raven) And the verdict on the bastardized Christian view?  “The limitation of this view is the involuntary association to a 'court of law', to the Christian concept of a 'Resurrection' where the pious may rise and the rest must burn.”  (ibid) Crap, of course.  (It is puerile, really, to still feel justified every time a Christian lie is exposed. So be it.) My Drive here is renewal and  transformation, illuminated by my Light of widened perception and liberation of abilities. This is a gate from which one does not return, so be sure when you enter. I can live with the Feather of Truth that it is mindful that I keep Judgement in mind today, and model my actions after my meditations upon it. “I shall rise up, let smallness and fear fall away below me; I shall expand my wings & be reborn.”   

Good morning and Welcome! to the Scales of Ma’at daily reading for 28-Oct-2015: WIW the Sun and the 3 of Pumpkins (Pentacles.) (Today’s deck is *The Halloween Tarot* by Kipling West. Halloween-themed, of course.) Let’s just jump right in, shall we? I have to rush for my costume-fitting at 9 a.m. for my role in the next Cthulhu movie – although they can’t decide if I should be the innocent victim tied to a rock awaiting her “bridegroom” or whether I should play Cthulhu itself. I’d like a go at the big guy – I can show Evil HOW to be Evil! Bwahahaha. Whoa, Mark, whoa, costuming for Cthulhu starts at 3 in the morning, it is so long and arduous, and yet you were sleeping. It’s the crying little girl for you, my friend. (SHIT!!) Actually, my heart today is filled with the divine Heart of XIX the Sun. I’m not a big fan of long, hot summers and making love on the grass in the countryside (ticks, fleas, critters & creepy crawlies; and Ladies, you’ll stop asking for this bucolic experience one you’ve woken up at 3 a.m. after a camping trip and watched in horror and profound disgust as an 8” millipede crawls out of your snatch.) I’m not a big fan of gamboling children, either, one of the traditional images on this card. I much prefer the black cat and pile of happy skulls here. Sunflowers are admissible because they lend themselves to snacking, and I suppose in the interests of an honest breakdown of this card, I should admit that is probably me, the large, green double-headed troll happily chewing a bone (human) and just kickin’ back on a sunny day. Despite “things,” I’m not half-bad looking, am I? Hmmm. I like the Sun card, I do, and it is ALWAYS fortunate to have it turn up for a reading, unless the reading is at the express wish of a bitter daughter fighting tooth and nail with her avaricious step-mother for her defunct father’s millions and who has petitioned the court to halt the cremation.  “Sorry, my dear, the Court is ruling for Fire.” There really isn’t a lot to say about the guy, other than look at his bare bones: the Sun is on the Path of Resh, 30, on the Tree of Life. In Astrology he stands in the 5th House, for Joy, creativity and the proper use of power. He walks on the axis between Hod and Yesod, and of-course-you-booby his element is – ta-da! – Fire. His number, 19, has a cross sum of 10) The Wheel which has a cross sum of 1) the Magus. To Give without Reduction of Self. How about that? Do you think you are a wonderful enough product that you are motivated to give ENDLESSLY of yourself (when star-you goes, there are fireworks!)? My Drive is the Light, and living for generous & unconditional principles, while my Light is vitality, generosity, warmth and self-confidence.  “My inner sun shines bright, surrounding me with light.” Look who’s trying to catch his coattails to tell him something! Ha! The 3 of Pumpkins/Pentacles. I wonder what he wants. You know, I told the council this idea of letting the plebes speak directly to one of the Grand was a bad idea, didn’t I? (Oh do shut up, you dithering old fool.) The Feather of Truth today is apparently hidden in the mundane and quite material 3 of Pumpkins. The Master Craftsman. The pride of achievement, of winning through, of stick-to-it-ivness, all wrapped up and placed right at eye level where I cannot NOT see them. I see Hekate (cat) watching the balancing act, ready to help but not interfering, and this is the perfected utopia of the craftsman in one picture. What is the Feather of Truth here? I’m beginning to suspect that I know the answer, I just really, REALLY wonder if it is the right or totally wrong answer. I’ve ALWAYS been “tapped” or “tagged” to “do something” because I have a certain talent for it. I have never done it, and yet I have. Do I fear failure? Do I fear success? Is the willingness to explore that avenue, a gate which, once unlocked, can carry me beyond my wildest imaginings or am I taking the lid off of Pandora’s box? Well, 1st, calm down, you aren’t that grand, Mark, and secondly, if you want to follow through on that 2nd option, you know what you have to do; you’ve known for 401 years what you have to do. There were some valid excuses along the way, I’ll give you that? But now, really, no excuse suffices, and you just have to make a decision; are you going to explore that path of the future or not? Yes or no? Shit or get off the pot. I am already an accomplished and acknowledged master of my field, but my work lacks only the finishing polished stone or even gold pyramidion capstone, to make the pyramid complete. ON THE OTHER HAND, there is GREAT appeal to leaving it unfinished, a sign that “I” am not finished, either, not with this universe, not yet. (Oddly enough, ANOTHER card popped up with my 3, the 8 of Ghosts (cups) – Moving On. Ha! Reinforcement!! “Do it! Move on! Get going! Move it!”))) How are my bones holding up? (I’m always concerned about my “state of bones” since my troubles with my skeletal structure here on Terra firma.) Let’s look at them: aka Works, I’m in Binah in the Tree of Life and of course my element is the Earth. In astrology I’m Mars in the 2nd decan of Capricorn. This is where Binah is activated, and the alchemical wedding of sulfur, salt and mercury. It implies the basic idea of Earth, the crystallization of its powers and qualities, the commencement of matter to be established. My Drive is manifestation and understanding while my Light is progress and increase of substance. Well it’s a good draw as “Food for Thought.” I now have an idea, a REAL idea, of a project to begin after I leave the hospital, and one, with any luck, that shall carry me into the foreseeable future. “My Will flows in a perfect stream of force;”    

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at daily reading for 27 –Oct-2015: the Ace of Swords is my Heart card and XX Judgement is my Feather of Truth today. It’s almost here! Almost here!! Hallowe’en! THE best holiday of the year which really should be celebrated several times a year instead of those dull, unproductive and un-fun “other” holidays! Harrumph! (Today’s deck is *The Vampire Tarot* by Robert M. Place. IMHO, this is FAR and AWAY the best vampire deck out there going. It is also Robert Place, and in the interests of full disclosure, while I am wild about his art, it isn’t true that I had his love child. This is the vampire deck that is the TRUEST to the Dracula story/legend. Slightly oversized, it presents Robert’s art beautifully, and the cards are so wonderful there are a lot of “ooh!” moments. I’m always telling you to buy Robert’s decks, they are so good, and this one is no different, and what comes up in readings when using these is surprising just because of the effect that the art has on the psyche. It is something of a shame that today’s reading doesn’t convey the full impact of the deck, but it does give me an excuse to use it again this week. Plus, it is the ONLY vampire deck that is everything a vampire deck SHOULD be, but is STILL completely a Tarot deck. You cannot lose on this one!) Well, on with the fun while we have it today! My Heart is starting today as the Ace of Swords, and to tell you the truth (Ma’at is watching) I’m not really sure how I feel about that. I’m just not sure that I really WANT an Ace of Swords hanging around my field of action right now, with all of its bright, shiny new energy and pulsions towards action and thinking! thinking! thinking!  I’m getting ready to go under the knife in 3 weeks, immediately followed by a l-o-n-g period of the litany of recovery in a rehabilitation joint, so when I step out the door to check into the hospital it is entirely possible I may not return until the Solstice. Shit. Damn shit fuck. And I’M worried about our cats coping . . . LOL. More importantly, as I am “on the move” until probably the Winter Solstice, AND INTENSELY FOCUSED on my health and following routine and getting use of my leg back, IT WOULD NOT be a good time to get zealous and ambitious on an intellectual roller-coaster ride. “Acey, Acey, go away, come back again on I-say-so day!” We know he’s the essence of everything Air, but what else? Here’s the short & sweet of it: I’m in Kether in the Tree of Life by way of Fire (interesting, non?) We ALL think, of course, so I am better described as the “Decision-Making Function” – thinking. (Place) My Drive is invoked powers, whirling forces of mind realization & logic, while my Light is realization, clearness and objectivity. ALTOGETHER just where I DON’T need to be during approximately the next 2 months. If I can transform this (and I should be capable of it, why not? I’ve done harder things, Osiris knows!) into an entirely INNER journey of discovery and/or transformation and/or further illumination along the Path, then Yay: I’m a go, big thumbs up, anything to keep my mind busy while the body is out of commission. However, if it is a “call to arms,” count me out. Which, I do believe rather humorously and ghoulishly at the same time, is accompanied by a very “vampired” version of XX Judgement. Angels and Transformation are a long way from the revenant/ newly-risen new vampire on this card. Dracula fans will go nuts over this card. Who is it? It isn’t Jonathan Harker. The captain of the ‘Demeter’ is never named. So, who? You? (You ARE supposed to be “Captain of your own ship” . . . right?) Has something unsolicited and surprising, perhaps VERY out-of-the-ordinary, made a return in my life lately? Has it caused me to rethink origin(s) and/or perception(s)? Only one thing, one ITEM, has come up for final review in my life lately; it has been found wanting, therefore I shall cast it down, down into the circles of the Pit, there to burn and suffer evermore. I speak, of course, of my original steel tibia & knee replacement apparatus inserted 21 years ago and very much a source of “Damn you!” pain now. Out with the bad, in with the good, or at least new: plastic, lightweight, and quicker to integrate; a new knee. Actually it’s a new ½ leg, as the original damage was wildly extensive (I fell off a 2nd story roof in 1994.)So, darkly humorous, I think my Feather of Truth is mocking me a bit, telling me I take all of it MUCH too seriously. I certainly hope he isn’t looking for a date, young and kind of cute though he is, because I have hemorrhaged enough in one lifetime. Judgement is rather turned on its head here, and I can’t help thinking it is as if one is seeing the XX for the 1st time from the POV of the peripatetic third soul being judged; in some decks, it is a child saved as well, but in others, it is a soul who does not “pass” Judgement and is therefore condemned to eternal suffering. That serves as well as any other string of words to describe a vampire, wouldn’t you say?  So, not so serious, Mark, not so lugubrious, either. Lighten up. And get your shit together because the Time is closer than you think. “My bare bones are from Jupiter and Saturn in Aquarius (liberation and redemption) and – ta-da! - I’m of Fire. I’m on the Tree from Malkuth to Hod, and my number’s cross sum is a revelation of destiny” (? –okay, but hmmm) (Raven) But the real me is here, and my Drive is birth, renewal, and transformation (well, ye-e-e-s, “kind of” like a vampire) yet my Light is widened perception and the liberation of hidden abilities. All in all, this could be a very interesting day if looked at as a way to prepare on ALL levels for a physical invasion; for battle. I can do that. So from beginning to end, I started rather offended at the possibility that I was seeing this ace NOW, to an amused yet serious curiosity at the end upon contemplating Jonathan the vampire. So, what it really all boils down to is this, and I know it to be true: I trust myself in this moment.     

Sunday, October 25, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my daily Scales of Ma’at reading for 26-Oct-15. (Today's deck is the *Singing Serpent Tarot* by Eleanor Boyce. Very Aubrey Beardsley-esque, it is a wonderfully evocative deck.) It’s getting close! The best holiday of the year! Why governments don’t shut down for at least a week of celebrations is incomprehensible. LOL. That’s me – freaky and a fan of the occult since birth. I don’t classify tarot as “the occult,” it is too tied into our current psychology of the moment, but it certainly can become a gateway to the wonders & marvels unseen by those with “Betty Crocker eyes.” Today my draw is the 3 of Swords as my Heart card (!!!) and IX the Hermit as the Feather of Truth. I presume you know what I am doing – in the ancient Egyptian afterlife, the soul faced the trial of The Weighing of the Heart. This was presided over by Ma’at (Justice & Balance) and witnessed and verified by Anubis, Guardian of the Portal. If my Heart weighs more than the Feather of Truth, then it and I are tossed to Ammit, a hellish amalgam creature who will then devour us and, worst of all for an Egyptian, I am forgotten to history. “Your name shall not be remembered” is a deadly Egyptian curse. Okay? So, today as my Heart, I have a GIANT heart being pierced by three swords, one of those cards that everybody “checks” in a deck; for me, by suit, it is the 5 of Pents, the 3 of Swords, the 7 of Cups and the 8 of Wands. If they all please me, then the deck is sure to, as well. (I’m all over the place this morning; please forgive me. I’m running a temperature.) With this card I am in the land of Sorrow. One goes into Binah here, meaning the fields of understanding and perception and realization. The 3Sw is an Air element card, and in astrology he is Saturn in the 2nd decan of Libra. The dark side of understanding is being revealed to us, the truth behind the saying “it’s better to be lucky than smart.” “It is the curse of the Swords to be so clear and honest, to analyze what others prefer to ignore, to put in plain light what others hide in the dark. They are not like the Cups who are lucky when they understand themselves, the Swords are the Mind and when understanding what they see, they dive into melancholy.” (Raven) Interesting, isn’t it? That melancholy is our answer to understanding? I can SO feel that to be true, but I can no more explain it than I can explain the engine of a Titan rocket. Sure, the principles are clear, but it is their application that is so damn hard! So the Three of Swords can talk of a painful realization, a hard decision that has to be made, and the melancholy of Saturn when recognizing the unveiled truth. They also can stand for a disappointment, the loss of an illusion, or the detection of a treachery, a lie, a deceit. My Drive here is melancholy, and facing a painful truth; my Light is understanding, “sober” conduct, and losing false illusions. I should be very careful, however, that I don’t REMAIN in disappointment, pain, sadness or sorrow. So, who’s keeping me company on this rocky part of the Path? Ha! I should have known, who else would come here with me? IX the Hermit. I have a soft spot for the Hermit, and that is a stupid and foolish thing to have, because he is just as powerful and amoral as any card in the deck. I automatically think of myself when I see the Hermit, and that is both right and wrong. My exterior life has always been on display, in one form or another, and it hasn’t been a particularly private life, either. My INNER life, however, from as far back as I can remember, was led as the Hermit. I perceived, perhaps in the womb? that I wasn’t to be accepted as me, but as what & who “they” wanted me to be. So when it came time to slide down the charnel chute, my mother gave birth to twins that day. Their me, and the real me, the Hermit. (How she passed the lantern is a real story! LOL) IX the Hermit is on the Path of Yod, #20 in the Tree of Life. He is Saturn as the keeper of the gate, or Saturn in Aquarius, standing for the search of wisdom. In the Zodiac he is, interestingly, the Virgin; he leads from Chesed to Tiphareth, and not surprisingly, he is of the element Earth. “Listening to the inner voice and caring for the inner self. Retreat from any 'high life' and loud company, it is a time of self-reflection and self-realization. For most people, the silent loneliness of the Hermit appears unattractive, but behind the Hermit is the wisdom of the High Priestess. You cannot listen to your inner voices while having a party . . .” (Raven) Tetragrammaton! Ain’t THAT the truth! My drive is to retire, retreat from the masses, and to look into myself. My Light for this comes from wisdom, realization, mental maturity, and the inner light. So that’s what’s up today, from this numerical knot in the fabric of space-time. I have the irrational hope that somehow, having done this, my fever will disappear. I know, I know, I might as well go to the gypsy with a black chicken and $500 in cash. It doesn’t work that way. Illogic springs eternal. However, there is always aspirin, otherwise known as the Eucharist of Sufferers.  Let’s see if the Hermit has any last words before we embark upon our solitary path today. . ah. My affirmation for today is, “I dwell at the center of myself.”  And yes, I get it; “thank you, Thoth! (I know it was him.)   

Saturday, October 24, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my daily Scales of Ma’at reading for 25-Oct-2015: the 6 of Pentacles is my Heart and XVIII the Moon is today’s Feather of Truth. (Today’s deck is the *Ghost Tarot* by Davide Corsi. Well, it’s dark, almost too dark to read, but the ghosts are well-done. It is a curiosity deck, not one I’d buy if I had to go earn my living with the cards.) I admit to being curious about the 6 of Pentacles representing my Heart; Funnily enough, the blurb given to it in the LWB is puzzling: “Patience and waiting lead to small moments of eternity. But there is no eternity in solitude.” Wow, let’s all talk about oracular mutterings over some kraters of wine. The card is commonly called Success, and he sits in Tiphareth in the Tree of Life. He is of the Earth, of course. In astrology he is the Moon in the 2nd decan of Taurus, and he is your “forerunner” into Tiphareth, which is vitally important as you have just “experienced” the 5 of Pentacles (if one were following the journey like that, strictly linear.) I have been ill the last few days, so it is HARD to see that 6 moving me into Tiphareth, but who knows, stranger things have happened. “The 6 achieves a wiser attitude towards material concerns. Nothing is taken for granted so easily anymore, and losses won’t be taken for the end of the world.” (Raven) My Drive as the 6 is Overcoming a Crisis & Success; while my Light is Wealth, generosity and nobility. I DO need to be careful of False Pride, as well as taking things for granted or being prodigal with my resources. So that is kind of the so-so place I can say my Heart is today, and what lessons it can pick out of the hopper. The far more fascinating element in today’s draw is XVIII the Moon. In this case, I think it is better to START OFF with Drive & Light; my Drive is entering the underworld and exploring the depths of soul, my confrontation with the dark side. My Light here, illuminating the way, is Intuitivism, wisdom, maturity, and a deep self-realization. I sit on the Path of Qoph (29) on the Tree of Life, and of course I ride that Scorpio like a broncobuster. Pisces keeps me company because of course I’m Water, and form the connection for Netzach to Malkuth. My number’s a bit odd, 18 signifies the Return of the Animal (sun/moon eclipse) and yet the cross sum is 9, a number of great wisdom as personified in the Hermit. “The Moon will lead us into the blackest depths of our soul, into the world of the subconscious, where there are no more words, just images and notions. It represents a journey into the darkest night, a look behind our own face.” (Raven) I like the Moon, but I know that for most people, The Moon isn't the most comfortable trump. Equated with the mysteries it has glamour and appeals which are trumpery, people don’t enjoy looking into their own abyss. Unlike most trumps, the Moon has no real negative aspect, but it implies a serious danger. The journey into night could be too much when we're not prepared and we might get lost in our own shadow, but I don’t fear that – I am intimately acquainted with my shadow, and there is nothing there that Anima and I can’t handle together. After all, the company and the co-operation start at home, right? That’s all I have to say about this draw today, I get it. I need to go “inside a while” with the reminder that $$ concerns WILL work out to my benefit if I approach solving that problem with a team attitude. I really AM ill, thus the brevity. Hopefully tomorrow will be windbag-gy and over-worded, as usual! LOL.   

Thursday, October 22, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to the Scales of Ma’at 2-card daily reading for 23-Oct-2015: the 8 of Pentacles and XV the Devil, representing respectively my heart and the Feather of Truth. (Today’s deck is the absolutely wonderful and unique *The Golden Age of Hollywood Tarot* by Lorelei Douglas. If you saw the film, you’ll remember the premise of “Death Becomes Her” is that Isabella Rossellini sells you the Potion of Eternal Youth but in exchange you must arrange to disappear from the stage (of life.) I am convinced all the old Hollywood stars had enough cash to opt in, all moved to a retirement community outside of Perth, Australia, and Lorelei knows them all. A fun and inspired deck. Wonderfully apt, well thought out. It’s a good deck. And FULL of suggestions for a Hallowe’en costume!) “Ma! Ma-a-a-a! The crop’s in, Ma!”  Humphrey and Katharine give us our definition of completed work and master craftsmanship winning through at the end in this 8 of Pentacles, my Heart card for today. More importantly, let’s take a quick look at the bones to find out where my heart is at. Prudence is where this card is at, and it’s saying to my Heart, BE prudent (you have a tendency to be Imprudent, my man.) He’s in Hod on the Tree of Life, arriving through the Element Earth. In Astrology, he’s the Sun in the 1st decan of Virgo. New beginnings based on logic, time & consideration are indicated. It’s a simple card, really, with Drive being consideration & prudence; my Light is the realization of coherences & the ability to wait for the right moment. This is ALL good. It sounds like get-your-shit-together-time in the Blessed Fields where I would like to dally. And yes, I need to do exactly that; with the destructions of the eidolons of my old self, and “the freeing of the slaves” there should be nothing barring my way to progression in practicing, at a high level, the work necessary for my eventual (fingers crossed) Enlightenment, and reunion with the Ain Soph. (Well, if you are going to aspire, you might as well aspire BIG, right?) So MUCH is in place now – I have worked like a fuckin’ field-hand – for over 60 years getting this puzzle put back together. I absolutely demand of myself that we finish the journey giving 110%, for whatever time is left to me; I’m counting on the Lord of Light and Darkness to keep his word and part of the deal. “I work; We join.” We shook hands on it, it’s a done deal. Funnily enough, the Feather of Truth today is XV the Devil. I’ve known a few Mrs. Robinsons over the years, and yes, they ARE ALL like that; bitter, twisted, highly intelligent & mortally dangerous. We forget that we live with lionesses; they want it that way, too. They are intelligent; they “doublethink” as easily as they breathe; they are the hunters, the providers and the mothers of our race. We have a thousand clichés for it: “What a woman wants, a woman gets,” “When a woman takes aim at another woman, she aims to kill,” “Only women understand women, and they detest each other.” On and on. What is behind all of that is an acknowledgement that the secret masters of the race, the guarantors of our future, are, in fact, mistresses: Woman GUARANTEES Man. Woman, however, is necessarily more preoccupied with survival in the physical, leaving man free to float on the lazy, mystical currents of metaphysical reflection. Not that she isn’t capable of it! far from it! but, of necessity, SHE has to assure we have a future before she starts refining it for herself. Men are far more selfish. That is what makes it so easy to see Woman as the Devil – the need to conquer the physical and hold sway over it. “The Devil Wears Prada.”  (A wonderful, revealing, story that Meryl Streep tells on herself is when she took her daughters to see that film. Her daughters are adult, now, with the youngest around 17 or so. At the end of the film, with deadpan delivery, they turned to her and said, “So, Mother, you just played yourself.”) I LOVE the Material. I luxuriate in silks and satin, I like jewels & precious stones, glittering palaces and fantasy celebrations to celebrate anything at all. I’m that kind of guy. But I learned, LONG AGO, not to be enslaved. I have Walked Away 3X times in my life; by that, I mean, after considered reflection, going home and packing a suitcase, or two (2) MAXIMUM, then going to your favorite watering-hole or social gathering-with-friends place, plop your keys down saying, “I’m outta here, it’s been real! Ciao!” and walking out the door to catch the waiting taxi for the airport. At the airport, I would just choose the 1st flight out – to freedom. Perhaps priceless shit was left behind; perhaps souvenirs or memories; it’s gone. There is you, your freedom, and enough clothing to fend off the elements until you find your next base of operations. Leaving It All Behind. It never gets easier, it is always scarier than shit. My last time, and probably THE last time, was 2003, I was 51 and made a BIG jump – the U.S.A. to France, permanently (a permanent as anything ever is.) I work, and have worked, HARD to not be enslaved by my own taste for decadence and luxury, libertinism and Let-My-Burning-Bridges-Light-My-Way! - style of living. I long ago passed through my I-incarnate-the-Devil phase, freed myself from the chains (and no, I’m not under delusion or illusion) of placing value in illusions and wills-o’-the-wisp. No, I don’t live like a monk in Plato’s cave, but that would be rather ostentatious, wouldn’t it? Ha! I live a comfortable life, and I am AWARE of what it is made. So today, I think XV is simply a reminder that part of my 8 of Pents working the Path today is to keep in mind the values of non-attachment to illusion, to not “fall prey to the Devil.” I am, of course, free to do as I choose.  

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at for 21-Oct-2015: the Knight of Swords as the Heart and XVI the Tower as the Feather of Truth. (Today’s deck is the *Black Cats Tarot* by Maria Kurara. Cute. Black cats get their shot at it.) Based on all the data shoved into the computer so far (deck; spread; relevancy of cards, revelations) I decided to right up front draw an I-Ching hexagram as the “help me make sense of this” card. It is Hexagram 49 Revolution/Shedding.  Wow! It seems as if there is going to be “a good time in the old town tonight!” The Feather of Truth is XVIF the Tower and my “directive draw” is Revolution/Shedding; methinks I am being told in no uncertain terms to “Buckle your seatbelt(s); it’s going to be a bumpy night.” (Bette Davis/Margo Channing, *All About Eve*) I am going to dismiss the Knight of Swords; that is to say, yea, yea, yea. Been there, done that. I KNOW, I know. I should just have it branded into my forehead so that everyone can know, there are no questions, and we can move business right along. And by the way, smartass little Missy Tarot, I’m too old to be a knight. Update, ostrich-girl. (Shhh - maybe she won’t know any better, that I am terminally self-involved; my saving grace is that, unlike most men, I admit it.) Back to business. I am floored, literally floored by this development. I rarely pull XVI in readings in general; I have NEVER pulled it for myself (although there were times . . .) before, at least not in memory. It would seem that my life is on the verge of upheaval. Old systems die, new systems are born. The hexagram advises me to take it in stride; if I’m not in tune with the Revolution yet, be calm and wait, I will be. Line 6 - the Revolution has already taken place, in case I didn’t know. It is time to notice that! Line 5 - My ideas of change can find fertile ground if I state clear guidelines. Line 4 – Allow intuition to guide my behavioral change, consciously, with detailed preparation. Line 3 – No haste, Mark. Think things out. Line 2 – Precision and explication is absolutely vital for community. Do that. Line 1 – Be clear in your choice, Mark; if in doubt, wait. Lead by surety. Whooo . . . that is a LOT to digest in one plate of Ramen noodles. I DO have a “The-Revolution-IS-Coming” rap that I have found in my mouth much more often lately. This is so because, and yes I believe this, We are already lost as a civilization. We have fucked it up SO bad that there is no turning back time, not now, it is too late. I see, and “see,” the Revolution coming, but it isn’t Che Guevara, we are too decadent and perverse for that kind of action to have any meaning. No, THIS Revolution is the heart, mind & soul of enlightened man, and there is one thing everyone forgets; Enlightenment is pitiless, way deep down. It is us fulfilling and evolving into our genetic destiny, and Evolution (Mother Nature) is the most pitiless deity of all. I’m not doing a lot of Tarot-y things today with today’s cards – I’m not in the mood; these cards just swept me away into my personal visions of the future and how perilous a time it is in which to be alive and striving for Enlightenment. The world has become an actively devouring maw of evil, driven by the engine of the majority’s blind life-force, and there is no sign of it REALLY slowing down, much less reversing. I feel very much as if we are being told, “Hurry Up! Evolve RIGHT NOW or DIE!” It is helpful to remember that She had no problem wiping out the 160 million year reign of the dinosaurs when they failed to build a self-sustaining and progressive civilization. She won’t even need to blink her eyes for us, we are in the process of doing it ourselves. Every morning, I pray to the All-Spirit to be “given my directions and to know my role” in the world that is on the verge of birth. It can change everything, or it will die on the delivery table along with the mother, us. Places, everyone; it is important that this child lives. VERY important.  


Monday, October 19, 2015

There is no reading today. A bientôt! And remember, "May a deck full of possibilities be yours!

Sunday, October 18, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my 2-card daily draw, the Scales of Ma’at, for 19-Oct-2015: the King of Cups is my Heart card and the Feather of Truth is the 8 of Cups. I feel a frisson of horripilate delight as the month winds down; our greatest holiday is almost here! Hurrah! (Today’s deck is *Penny Dreadful: The Tarot of Vanessa Ives* by Showtime [yes, the network] and an anonymous artist to whom we shall attribute no blame. These cards COULD HAVE BEEN so much more, but unfortunately they are of poor quality and made almost unusable by brand-marketing and flimsiness of quality. A kitschy TV show memorabilia item. Do NOT buy to read, but if you like the series, euh . . . . If I have to use them, then I just take the card title and run with it, the card itself helps 0%. Honesty compels me to admit that I liked the series, so I bought the cards. Ah well, live and learn. Now I must contact Eva Green and tell her the sad news of her impending blindness.) So today, I’m handing out a mishmash of what I think, maybe a bit of what Raven thinks (google him, informative) but most of all what THAT center of Activity activated by the IDEA of the King of Cups as my Heart card, and ditto for the 8 of Cups as the Feather of Truth. 1, 2, 3, Go! The first thing that has always struck me about the King of Cups is how UN-kingly he ALWAYS looks in most decks, and even in those where it isn’t obvious, the idea is already firmly implanted in my psyche about this card. Even here, in this severely limited deck, he seems TO ME to be staring down at the Chalice in doubt, and clinging all over his right, logical side is the tentacular octopus representing - ? Certainly not malevolent sea life; what interests me here A LOT, is that the Feather of Truth card for today is the 8 of Cups, and the King is being consumed by an 8 (OCTO-pus), as well. I need to take a closer, spare, theoretical look at the #8 in Tarot.  Alright, what is 8? It is one number beyond Perfection, and thus Infinity. (Lay it sideways, you see? Admit it, you were shocked, the farm will never look the same now, will it? J ) This is the card that insists you move on from an overwhelming emotional situation Okay, I can grok that, my Cup has been WAY supercharged for a while now. I can groove on the idea that I’m encouraging myself, “Okay, that’s enough, for now, you’ve got things that need attention, pal.” The meaning of eight rolls into our consciousness with the momentum of all the numbers that came before it. We just stepped out of the aspects of structure and perfection in the number seven, and that paved the way for yet another evolution in the magic of numbers. As an evolved child of structure, the number eight seeks balance with non-structure. Number eight is about cycles, revolutions, and progress gained on the invisible level. I know what I am asking myself; “What moves me to inspiration? What can I learn from the cyclical patterns in my life?” These questions offer a depth to this number, and encourage us to use the number eight in our spiritual practices with a goal to tap into that rhythmical, cyclical nature. With this in mind, I can look at the King of Hearts IN my Heart and ask myself, “What have I learned here? Why is it this way for me? Do I need to change it, or am I OK with it?” Given this, I think I’m going to throw an I-Ching consideration into it. Just a second . . . alright, I have it; Hexagram 37 - Kinship. This calls me to recognize my own role in the “family” (yes, I have one, quite large, heteroclite and varied as it is!), and to fulfill it to the utmost. I know the role, Pater Familias. My father left the stage when my mother died, leaving my wife and I as “the eldest living couple” in MY family, and here in France (my wife’s native land), our family is large and varied, one we have created for ourselves, and again, we are among its elder members, certainly the eldest living and married. It is true that I oftentimes shirk my duties as Pater Familias to either A) play the buffoon, or B) absent myself in every way but physically. Pay attention, Mark! Put some Balance and attention back in your role, dude. I need to honestly ask myself if openness and trust are in my relationships. Express your feelings, and BE SURE to live your ideal. It seems to me that in this hexagram, it is line 4 which is the most pertinent to me today, and it fits nicely for numerological manipulation. (2 [cards] X [line] 4 = 8, the number enduring the Question under the pointed investigations of my subaltern, Tomás de Torquemada.)  Here is line 4; “Balance is the first and most important rule in each relationship among equals. Make sure that justice is done to each person – not justice in the same way but according to each person’s needs.” (Marlies Holitzka, LWB) Yep. Yep yep yep yep. “That’s my cab, ma’am. Step aside, don’t make me use my stun gun.” Balance, Justice, 8, Live Your Ideal, XIV, VIII, never a week goes by that I am not reminded that these are my Striving For – points, where I need to be steering this boat through the shoals, or over the deep, deep dark of Nun, oldest of the ancient Egyptian gods, “He of the Primeval Waters.” Nun’s qualities were boundlessness, darkness, and the turbulence of stormy waters . . . LOL, I really DO have to chuckle, as I imagine that is a close approximation of how I am described by my “family” members. Ha! Well, despite my loudly proclaimed statements to the contrary, I do NOT believe myself to be a god, or even a re-incarnated pharaoh. An aside: Has it occurred to anyone else that it certainly is coincidental that no one who remembers incarnations of the past remembers ever having lived a rather dull, pointless life that had nothing to do with spiritual growth but merely farting and eating and surviving? Discuss among yourselves . . .  So, really, we wind up back at a card that was NEVER drawn, or rather TWO cards not drawn this morning, but which are the actual forces at work: VIII Justice and XIV Temperance. Well, I can live with that today; I’ve been making steady course corrections for several years, and I believe we are much truer to our goal than before. So today, as I stand in the airport wrapped in orange toilet paper holding a tin pot begging coins, the mantra you hear me chanting will be, “I move towards balance and harmony. Ommm. I move towards balance and harmony. Ommm . . . .”   

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at daily 2-card reading for 18-Oct-2015: the Knight of Swords is my Heart card and as the Feather of Truth I have drawn X The Wheel of Fortune reversed. (Today’s deck is *The Vampire Tarot* by Nathalie Hertz. The style is a kind of Conan/Animé/Frazetta look to the artwork, RWS system. Fine deck, nothing exceptional. If you are a heavily tattooed reader with a penchant for gay Goth excess, this is the deck for you. Adam Lambert, are you listening?)  And, in a different way, that is the question I need to ask myself today, Am I listening?? I thought I was, but here they are again, dogging my footsteps and making me doubt myself by telling me that I have yet to do/accept the necessary when I KNOW I just walked through this with the deconstruction of the golems. A frightening thought – that had everything to do with liberating Water/Cups in myself; are the cards telling me I need to do the same with ALL 4 suits?? Oh shit, I hope not. My most problematic suit is and has always been Cups –lack of love and acceptance shaped my entire life from birth, the love & acceptance that come from acknowledgment of your personhood, your right to Being. Abuse, physical/sexual/mental, can turn you inward, as well, and forced me to take the accelerated course in Growing Up, Getting Over It, and NOT Caring about my emotional needs or those or others. All of that made me unto as granite, but I’m supposed to be flexible as a human being, I know that. Granite isn’t flexible, so with “Living-as-erosion”, it finally succumbs to the years and the tears and the fears, and I wearily get to my feet and kick that pitiful old dragon’s carcass into the river to be washed out to the Ocean. I’m so fucking tired of seeing the Knight of Swords. And if I’m not accused of being the Knight, then I’m being niggled at because as King I haven’t yet cleaned the Augean Stables. I’m fucking sick of it. That means I’m fucking sick of me, & that can’t be right; 1st, the Knight ISN’T me, I don’t have illusions about being that energetic youth, in ANY way, shape or form. To repeat, VERY quickly, what I’ve seen seven quadrillion times now in the past year or so. . (deep breath . . .plunge!) Prince of the Chariot of the winds, Tiphareth in the Tree of Life, Astrology: astride Capricorn and Aquarius. His Element and world are the Air in the Airs of Yetzirah. He is “the pure manifestation of mind and intellect, full of plans and ideas which on the worst side may disturb and confuse each other, on the best create an inexhaustible spring of creative thoughts.” (Raven) His Drive is idealism and intellectual agility and his Light is creativity, rich ideas, intelligence and the mastery of words. His Shadow is what you REALLY need to watch; he can be harsh, malicious, unreliable, cheating and crude. (Raven & Mark mash-up.) If it wasn’t counterproductive and a grotesque mirroring, I’d take him over my knee and give him a good spanking, “Get over yourself!” As for the Feather today, well, come on, you bitch, go ahead and TRY to fuck me running, because I defy you. You DARE to give me X The Wheel of Fortune reversed?? You bitch, I KNOW that card by heart, it is scratched in a death agony on my Akashic record! Times are tough and my radically shrinking retirement check isn’t helping. (I depend on money from the U.S. government where tribal incomes are gathered and redistributed, and with our tribal wealth based on petrol [discovered just before 1900 C.E.], whose bottom has just fallen out on the “Market,” we are fucked. Tribe = Osage.) Unfortunately, petrol has not YET become so rare that its uses as a plastics base and other functions BESIDES powering our societal greed are top priority. Not yet, but that WILL happen. (I’d say “I’ve seen it in the cards,” but then I would have to explode with self-mocking laughter. It sounds too much like masturbation.)  Okay, SIGH; let’s look at her bones, her skeleton, so to speak, yet ONCE AGAIN (sighing): The Wheel of Fortune, on the Path of Caph, 21 in the Tree of Life. Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto - the masters of Karma are playing together in the sandbox here, and as we all already know, those planets are ALL about Us & the Tree, or the “deep, space-y” parts of our being and relationship with the Ain Soph. Its planet is Jupiter, and is on the axis Chesed – Netzach. Its Element is Fire, and Number is 10 (= 1). Its Drive is eternal motion, change and acceptance of fate (I’m being a *shit* right here on this point today), and Its Light is unexpected changings & fortune, and the realization of luck. More to the point, today, for me, it reads reversed, thus I need to beware its Shadow, which is fatalism. I can feel Mother Hateful hovering right around the corner: Mother Hateful is the secret, hidden, gay-bitchy, nastiest-snatch-in-the-room  queer-with-an-agenda-me that I developed as a youth and who I keep deep, deep in the closet, chained to a bubbling kettle next to her spice rack of unreasoning hates. I detest her, but she does break free from time to time, although less, now, because HER death is implicit in the golems’ destruction. Nevertheless, “Watch your sparkles, Sweetcheeks; they could set something on fire.”  Well, I need to get my head back on straight and stick it right up Creative Visualization’s birthing channel, and deposit this affirmation, so that I can at least START the upward swing! “Great wealth, good health and happy fortune now flow into my life.” (Thoth system)   

Friday, October 16, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my Scales of Ma’at daily reading for 17-Oct-2015: The King of Pentacles is my Heart card, and as the Feather of Truth I have drawn the King of Wands (I started to write Creativity.) (Today’s “October deck” is the *Dark Grimoire Tarot* by Michele Penco & Giovanni Pelosini. 1st things first – the art is mediocre & too ochre. Other than that, it’s medium-cool; I wish they could have done greater justice to H. P. Lovecraft and his entire Cthulhu mythos. I’ll compare it soon with a different Necronomicon (“Dark Grimoire” of the title) deck. This one? My well-considered opinion is, “harrumph!”) I’m just going to jump, because this reading seems to just flow from my fingertips. I’ve pretty well accomplished all I can with my health for the moment (and my money), and now I simply must wait for the surgeons to do their work and for a stay in Dr. Moreau’s House of Re-education and Rehabilitation. I’ll be gone most of the last two months of the year due to this surgical intervention in my life, but it IS necessary and I WANT it. My Health and Money, and yes, I am King of both energies, AND I have reached an impasse in BOTH realms. Well, I need to wait for the wind-up to wind up, and then do what the cards have been screaming at me in so many ways for so many days, “Break Out! Fly, Mark, Fly! Create!” I’ll whip up a pair of wings while I’m in the hospital, I guess! Seriously, my Feather of Truth card today is the King of Wands, and for some reason this is hitting me really hard today because of its urge to create. Hey, me too! I’d LOVE to be able to create an inspired oeuvre and offer it to the Universal Spirit, the Lord of Light and Darkness, with love in my heart. I don’t have an artistic bone in my body, OTHER than I am a fabulous, capital F, storyteller. I live in the wrong age; I need to be called upon to tell stories, like Isak Denisen in her autobiographical “Out of Africa”: she spins stories, wonderful stories, for her dinner guests in Kenya, providing they provide the first line. (Meryl Streep does a magnificent job with this moment in the eponymous film.) Looking at the King of Wands I can see myself SO clearly, and even the Tarot’s little joke on me; this deck, with this king, go ahead, look at his left knee/leg. A younger, newer face on his knee – THAT is the exact same leg & knee upon which I will be operated in November! That’s me sitting there! Well, I’ll be damned! All of this is obvious and the progression through “kingships” is something the cards are asking me to consider today. I need to remember, though, that the Journey through the Arcana is like being inside a glove; you don’t get to jump from fingertip to fingertip when you are actually on the Path (“in the glove”), you must go up and down the full length of each separate finger in order to reach the successive “kingship progression.” As far as the minor arcana is concerned, my Heart is currently very much focused on being the King of Pentacles, and the Feather of Truth is that I should shift perspective and gaze and focus on the kingship for which I am waiting with ill-disguised anxiety/patience.  It’s a short post today because I’m feeling rather mentally brusque today. It is nothing having to do with you, my many millions of faithful followers, nay, worshippers, LOL; I just want to keep it clipped, brusque and short today. So, I shall focus today on: “I open myself to my own success and creativity.”


Thursday, October 15, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to my 2-card daily draw, the Scales of Ma’at, for 16-Oct-2015: as my Heart card stands VIII Justice and as the Feather of Truth stands II the High Priestess. (Today’s deck is *XIII Tarot* by Nekro. It’s a rather typical “dark” deck, “Conan meets H.R.Giger” but the card format really works against this art format. The images are far too intricate and monotone to be seen on a smaller-sized card like this, thus the images become USELESS, and one simply “draws the hand” in one’s head with the “labels” given to you. Typical Spanish deck. Yet I want to like it, in the same spirit that you want to acknowledge the child who tries hard but doesn’t win. Oh well, maybe next time . . . .) With  no help from the card art, no hints in which direction this reading wants to go, I’m going to look at it more Kabbalistically and alchemically than otherwise. With that in mind, let’s go say hello to my old friend and walking partner, VIII Justice. Like all the great levelers in Life, one says of VIII that it is a two-edged sword which cuts both ways, so be careful for what you ask. Without turning it into too much of a joke, I’m a lot like that – be careful what you ask of me, you will obtain it, but in what manner, what form? My heart has burned recently over the injustice of the world, he often does that, but as I age I become more reluctant to pick up that sword and more trusting in the fine-grinding of the Mill of Intentions and the Karmic clause in the Universe’s dealings with its inhabitants. I find it odd, humorous, touching and just a bit eerie that VIII would turn up here as ME, and not as the Feather of Truth, the symbol of Ma’at, who IS Truth and Justice, Balance and Harmony, and the ancient Egyptian “Way” (patriotic cheers.) Nevertheless, let’s take a look at her skeleton; She is Venus in Libra, standing for fairness and justice, and brightly aspected by Saturn. She IS Libra, and stands on the axis between Geburah and Tiphareth. She is of the Air, and as VIII -8-, she is the number of justice and adjustment. Justice is “a symbol for the balance of contrasts, complementing one another and also building up room and time. She combines the High Priestess and the Magician. Both are connected - true, conscious action results from realization; wisdom is based on action. The principle of activity completes itself with the passivity of inner reflection, the adjustment being the balance in between.” (Raven) She is uncompromisingly honest and objective; she IS the realization of cause and effect. Her Drive is the will for knowledge, harmony between reality and instinct, and objectivity while her Light is Balance, justice and fairness. Well, it sounds like my heart is in a good place today, but knowing myself, I’ll need to steer clear of any self-righteousness. Ha. As for my Feather of Truth for today, it’s an odd one to pair with the VIII, II the High Priestess.  Whap! Right between the eyes, “Hey, Sister, don’t forget intuition in your search for Objectivity!” I won’t have to work too hard at that; as much as VIII burns within me, I am currently subject to sudden excesses of emotion pouring out of my interior at the oddest moments. I know what they are; they are old incrustations of wounded emotions, finally coming free from their barnacle-like hold on the Golems I have so recently dismantled. There are finding their own ways to the surface and surfacing when they can, to lose form and rise and disappear on the cosmic breeze. Nevertheless, I have two women in the house today, so that means, “pay attention, Mark.” The manifestations of the Goddess are abounding and alive today here chez moi, it seems! This meeting makes me a bit nervous, but as long as there is no “females in prison” violence happening, I am content to stay silent and observe their interaction as played out in and through me today. Here is II the High Priestess, the Moon in Scorpio in the 12th House, the moon as symbol for the lunar consciousness, Scorpio standing for the powers of the unconscious and House 12 stands for the mysteries. She is astrologically the Moon, and sits in the Tree of Life on the connection between Kether and Tiphareth. I’ll give you one guess which Element is her –bzzz! Water, of course! Her number is 2 as the symbol of duality. “The High Priestess represents the deeper, more subtle aspect of the female archetype - the darkness, the mystery, psychic power, the might of the moon to enlighten the subconscious. The High Priestess is silence, passivity, containing a power of her own. Only when retiring from the world can we allow our subconscious to rise, listen to our inner voice and recognize our spiritual power.” (Raven)  Her Drive is the desire to find the inner sources, the primal springs, and her Light is being one with the beginning of all, aware of the wisdom from the subconscious, of intuitive knowledge and patience. I just need to be careful and slide off the deep end with one of these excesses of emotional “purging” to fall into too much dreaming or doubts, or ignoring reality. Nevertheless, on the Balance of things, my Intuition is a trustworthy friend.   

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Good morning and Welcome! to the Scales of Justice reading for 15-Oct-2015: the 8 of Pentacles (Quetzalcoatl) and X The Wheel of Fortune (The Sphinx). (Today’s deck is the *Fantastical Creatures Tarot* by Lisa Hunt & D.J. Conway. Runs the gamut from sweet to eerily-appropriate-on-so-many-levels. Meet new friends, greet old ones and hope to see your favorite - - - is more or less the delivery vehicle of the deck. It works . . . if you like fantastical creatures. I happen to do so, so it is alright by me. Fun and in my October theme.) I’m having a “return to comfy, protecting Earth-vibes” feeling today; have since I arose VERY early. Those mornings when you wake and, feeling okay in your skin, you rise and decide to “by Horus, let’s just do it. Get it done. Yeah, let’s just march on today,” and it is perfectly okay, deep down, feeling that way today, you know it. A very Pentacle-y day in your bones. And voilà ! I draw the 8 of Pentacles as my Heart card for today. The Toltec divinity pictured is Quetzalcoatl, Divine Father and King. He also appears, as you may know if you have ever done LSD, as a plumed flying serpent. He’s gorgeous; unfortunately this rather monochromatic illustration just doesn’t cut it. On a “Pentacle-y–feeling–day” like today, he is most likely to represent his basic divinatory translation: “it aids in strengthening self-confidence to tackle a new skill; professional progress felt; Recognition of the rewards and satisfaction of work.” (This last bit from the deck’s LWB.) Yeah, I can grok it. I get the vibe today, but just to be “sure-sure,” let’s approach it a bit differently. After all, my last meeting with this card was MOST unpleasant! But here, the 8 of Pentacles is known as Prudence, and resides in Hod in the Tree of Life, Hod through Earth. (Here’s how that works, from the Vox Populi, aka Wikipedia: “Hod [Hebrew הוד howd "majesty, splendor, glory"] is the eighth sephira of Kabbalistic Tree of Life. Hod sits below Geburah and across from Netzach in the tree of life; Yesod is to the south-east of Hod. It has four paths, which lead to Geburah, Tiphareth, Netzach, and Yesod.”) In Astrology I am represented by the Sun in the 1st decan of Virgo. For me, Hodder that I am (at least for this card! quit laughing), this means a new start, a new beginning. The Disks have learned the lesson that Saturn has taught in the disastrous Seven, that everything needs time and consideration. Now here within Hod, the area of logic, this can come true. (Raven & I, Chunky-style.) My Drive is consideration & prudence, while my Light involves the realization of coherences and thus the ability to wait for the right moment. Yes indeed, this can work quite nicely indeed. Accompanying Quetzal as he pavanes through the greenery around Tollàn, the Toltec capital, is X the Wheel of Fortune, here shown as the Sphinx. Every esoterist worth his incantations has a thousand and one immediate associations for the Sphinx, so the field is wide-open. Here we don’t exactly have pictured the 4-points Sphinx of initiation, but rather a Sphinx entering Consciousness like Cleopatra/Elizabeth Taylor being pulled into Rome on that enormous rolling Sphinx, all in gold of course. Accompanied by flocks of giant ibis (Thoth), and preceded by a mystically floating sign for eternal life (ankh) hovering over a wadjet eye (protection). Well! That is certainly an entrance! (You can hear the women whispering “exotic slut!” while the men ogle her cleavage (Elizabeth’s, not the Sphinx’s.) Let’s see how he’s going to fit in with 8, shall We? X the Wheel is a quaternary Being, made of Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto - the masters of Karma. Uniquely enough, they have chosen Jupiter to represent them. He travels the axis between Chesed – Netzach; his element is unsurprising Fire, his number 10 is 1, etc. We have been through ALL of this very recently when the 10 showed up in a slightly grayer draw. I LOVE X, s/he’s even my business Muse & logo. I am NOT saying I love bad luck!! Don’t even THINK that idea, Universe! What I would like to say is that I can understand Change. Good? Yes. Needed? Yes. Whoever is on whichever end of this Perpetual Motion Machine, I NEED to go where I am going and I need to learn & recognize why. If I don’t, I don’t get to move on; I’m trapped in the cycle. I know all of this; I’ve lived it, and ESCAPED it, before. But it is beautiful to watch turn its’ karmic perfection, is it not?  You MUST, however, watch out for its’ possible fatalism! Ha! My drive is eternal motion and, amongst many, acceptance of fate, while my Light resides in unexpected change and the realization of the nature of Chance. This actually works quite well with 8, me as “job-seeker” (even though I’m not; it serves the metaphor.  I AM seeking new directions for my talents and energy after the latest round at the refurbishing plant . . . hmmm.) So today, feeling Hoddish and all, I think I’ll just kick back, relax and depend upon Life.